Shomari Figures

All was sweetness and light Monday morning at a ceremonial ribbon-cutting for Mobile’s wider, deeper ship channel – at least until U.S. Rep. Shomari Figures took his turn at the podium.

An impressive array of local, state and national elected officials past and present were on hand, not to mention business executives, port leaders and even an assistant secretary of the Army. Former Sen. Richard Shelby was repeatedly showered with tributes and ovations, described as the visionary who’d seen the need for the project and then brought home much of the money to pay for it.

Figures took a slightly different tack. “I’m actually going to break protocol a little bit,” he said as the took the mic. “Talk about something that is little bit contentious, something that’s sensitive to a number of people, something that’s quite honestly a divisive issue.

Somberly, he added: “I cannot have this platform today in front of our elected officials, city leaders, state leaders, both Democrats and Republicans and not say it. I have to say it.

“Auburn clearly fumbled the ball,” he said. “At the goal line. Clear as day.”

Such gags are familiar fixtures of public gatherings and even Sunday sermons throughout Alabama, but it must be said that Figures’ windup was convincing enough to make people hold their breath. And the punchline played on wounds still fresh after the Tigers’ heartbreaking collapse against Georgia on Saturday. The loss was made all the more bitter by at least a couple of controversial on-the-field rulings, including one in which Auburn lost a touchdown over an iffy fumble call.

“I know Jimmy Rane just said, ‘I ain’t never donating to Shomari Figures,’” added Figures, referring to the founder of Great Southern Wood Preserving, who was sitting just a few feet away. Rane is considered the state’s wealthiest man and who is a longtime member of the Auburn board of trustees.

“But to show you you that I am indeed a person that can see both sides. I can admit that Kirby Smart was also calling for a timeout,” said Figures, referring to another disputed twist. “So we can at least agree on that, Jimmy, right?”

Rane seemed to appreciate the humor as much as the rest of the crowd, and gave a thumbs-up at one point. Whether that was for the not-donating-to-Shomari part or the Kirby-called-a-timeout part might require careful video review of the play to determine.

Figures, who earned a bachelor’s and a law degree at the University of Alabama, then segued slickly into more germane subject matter: “Speaking of protecting the ball, the port of Mobile is Mobile’s ball …”

Rane wasn’t among the speakers who followed Figures, but Sen. Tommy Tuberville, a former Auburn Tigers head coach, was.

“It’s good to be here,” said Tuberville. “I won’t talk about that game Saturday night.”